I’ve literally just made this account because I have nobody else to talk to. I’m so so scared. For the last few years I’ve suffered with severe health anxiety. In the last couple of years this has been fear of having bowel cancer. I’m only 26 and no family history but I’ve literally been so afraid of having it. It started a few years ago I had haemorrhoids and saw some blood when I wiped. They sent me to Google which came up with all the worst scenarios and ever since then I’ve been examining every time I go (gross I know) to the point of obsession where I had panic attacks when I thought I saw something that appeared red. I saw three doctors about this and I’ve had 1 sigmoidoscopy and 2 colonoscopies.
The first being in 2019, then 2020 and the most recent being 3 weeks ago. All of them came back normal expect for haemorrhoids. However after some time I start to panic again. After having the last one done I panicked when I saw the report and they said the bowel prep was “fair” meaning they could adequately see. This made me panic because I got scared they missed something but I already had a “fair” prep on my colonoscopy before in 2020 so then I thought that surely they would have seen something on those two times if there was anything. Anyway these last few days I’ve been seeing black specks when I wipe and I’ve been crying non stop thinking this is it and I’m going to die. I’m already thinking of going back for another colonoscopy. This fear is making me severely unhappy and I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m sorry this is long but I’m really struggling and need support.