I need help finding a good doctor...

So I don’t have an official diagnosis, but with my symptoms, I’m almost positive it’s IBS-D. This has been destroying my life and mental health. I went to a gastroenterologist over a year ago for this problem, when symptoms started to happen more frequently. Now, it’s extremely rare that I don’t get a day without a flare up.

That doctor made me extremely anxious, but ruled out any food allergies, and I wound up never going back. The main issue is that I’ve struggled with Anorexia for 10+ years, and the flare ups have made it even more difficult to eat. A lot of people may not understand, but having an eating disorder makes finding a suitable doctor extremely difficult, especially for stomach issues. Not many MD’s specialize in eating disorders, and the majority of other doctors are extremely insensitive and lack awareness about how to treat and speak to someone with an eating disorder.

For example, if a doctor suggests I go on a diet, it could be extremely harmful to me both mentally and physically. Additionally, I am terrified of having a colonoscopy. I’m a young adult who hasn’t needed a routine one yet. I’ve had anesthesia before and have experienced panic attacks while under. Additionally, the prep would be so incredibly triggering for someone who struggles with an eating disorder.

I need a doctor who I can discuss all of this with and who can understand all of my concerns. I live in NYC, so there should be plenty of options, but simple reviews on zoc doc or wherever aren’t going to tell me if this doctor can understand my situation. Does anyone have any advice? Are there websites where you can specifically ask others for doctor recommendations, or can that be done here? Is there anyone that has had similar concerns?