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An array of decorative mugs and teacups are turned upside-down, and coffee seems to be dripping out, save for one blue tear drop in the middle.

The Sadness of Losing Another Staple

When I first developed and was diagnosed with IBS, I was in major denial. I clung to my coffee (even having multiple cups a day), despite that it definitely did not seem to be helping my gut issues. I ate fatty foods, and at all hours of the day and night, not adhering to any routine. In some ways, this was understandable: I was still in college and had a full course load and worked multiple jobs to help pay my way since my parents could not contribute to my education. So, an erratic schedule and routine late nights (or all-nighters), were necessary at the time, even if they weren’t at all helpful to my health issues, including my IBS.

Even the first summer after I graduated, I continued to slug down coffee daily. But when autumn rolled around, and my IBS symptoms hit a peak of general terribleness, I knew I needed some sort of stability and to take a hard look at my dietary choices. Now that I no longer lived in a dorm and had to eat cafeteria food, I began buying groceries and making healthier meals for myself. And one seemingly small thing that made a big difference for my IBS: I gave up coffee. Instead I switched to tea. The difference was enormous, and I enjoyed my newfound freedom from the constant tummy rumblings my addiction to coffee caused. But it was still sad: I loved coffee, and craved it. It took years to fully get over the loss of it in my daily life.

Coffee alternative

Over the years, I made other dietary adjustments, but none as major as giving up coffee. I am already a vegetarian and have had to get rid of other things in my diet for other health reasons as well and it’s always a bummer. About a year and a half ago, I discovered herbal coffee, which isn’t really coffee, but tastes a lot like it. I found that that, with some coconut milk creamer added, drinking it let me enjoy the taste of coffee without worrying about the fallout to my IBS. When I discovered it, I drank it not just in the mornings, but after dinner, almost everyday.

But a few months ago, I began noticing that I would get sick and my IBS would flare the mornings when I drank it. I thought it was just a coincidence, but my intestinal reactions have gotten worse, instead of better, as time has gone on. Some adjustments seem to help a bit (but just a bit): it seems the creamer bothers me more than the coffee itself (which makes sense because the creamer is high in fat, and IBS doesn’t generally do well with fatty foods and drinks), so I tried being more conservative in its use or cutting it with low-fat plain almond milk. It helped a bit, but I didn’t like the taste nearly as much. I also tried letting the coffee seep a shorter amount of time, so less of it was in the drink. And having the coffee plain is too bitter to enjoy at all, so drinking it black was not an option.

Mourning the loss

So I decided to give it up for many weeks to see how my mornings improved. And they did (A LOT). Just the other day, after more than a month, I tried the herbal coffee again. I immediately became sick within an hour of drinking it. As such, I’ve decided I am going to (mostly) give it up, as I value keeping my IBS under control more than the temporary enjoyment of a beverage. However, it’s still sad to me, and I mourn the loss of something I did enjoy, considering my diet is relatively strict in so many other ways.

I’m letting myself have that mourning, as small as it sounds, because it’s important to acknowledge things that bother you, so you can reconcile it and move on. I know it’s the right decision to make and ultimately my body will feel better. But I can still feel a bit sad that I couldn’t continue to enjoy something I really looked forward to most mornings.

This doesn’t happen very often, but for some reason, sometimes foods or drinks that never bothered me before, or more specifically my IBS, begin to and I have to decide to weigh how much I want that staple in my life versus the impact it has on my IBS.

Another staple gone

Beer is another staple I used to enjoy much more often than I do nowadays — especially more full-bodied beers like red and brown ales. Lately I find my tolerance for them has lowered, and my gut doesn’t like them as much. Currently, I find that only very light beers (like lagers and pilsners) consistently don’t bother me, whereas ales are more of a gamble. As a result, I have scaled back on drinking ales a lot, and beer in general. The loss is not as huge as the herbal coffee as I didn’t drink beer by far as often, but it still irks me a bit. Nonetheless, I take comfort in knowing I am treating my body well and lowering my chances of IBS flares, which in turn allows me to live a fuller life.

Are there any staples you have had to give up in your life because it bothered your IBS too much? What were they and did you find good substitutes? Please feel free to weigh in in the comments section below!

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.


  • Gossamer
    6 months ago

    Thank you for your article. It really got me thinking.
    Does anyone know why some foods are fine then all of a sudden they cause a flare and you can no longer eat them? I’m finding that if I have processed carbs (white toast for breakfast or cereal) on an empty stomach I will be sick within 30 min. Can this really be IBS related?

  • tmholland moderator
    6 months ago


    This probably has been my number one question since being diagnosed with IBS. Why does this change? Is the IBS actually adapting to my system to wreak havoc again after making so many changes? I think there are a lot of factors involved, but have no definitive answer. Perhaps someone will chime in and provide some more scientific information :-). Thank you for your comments. -Todd, Team

  • SallyB
    7 months ago

    Does that also happen if you drink decaffeinated coffee. It could be the caffeine, can you drink coke etc…I can’t have any caffeine at all, as well as IBS it gives me migraines.

  • tmholland moderator
    6 months ago

    Hi @sallyb,

    I could be wrong, but I was always under the impression that it is the caffeine and the coffee itself (creates acid in the stomach). That said, there are people with IBS that can drink it. Our bodies are all very different and can tolerate different things. Perhaps someone else will chime in. Hope you are well today. -Todd, Team

  • slecorre
    7 months ago

    Hi, just wanted to comment that the ketogenic diet puts my IBS-C in remission. Don’t know if it could work for people with IBS-D as well?

    It’s great because I don’t have to deprive myself as much. I was off coffee and now I’m back on it with pleasure and no IBS pain on the keto diet. Take care everyone.

  • tmholland moderator
    7 months ago

    Hi @slecorre,

    It’s always great to hear that someone has found something that is working for them. I have to say that I’m awful jealous about the coffee :-). Thank you for sharing and I hope you are well today. -Todd, Team

  • Corgimom
    7 months ago

    Dairy, pineapple, alcohol, spicy foods, fatty foods, and lettuce. I just finally got tired of being in pain all the time and having terrible diarrhea. As soon as I did that, the pain disappeared and my flareups became much less. Nothing tastes as good as “no pain, no diarrhea” feels.

  • tmholland moderator
    7 months ago

    Hi @corgimom,

    I love the ‘nothing tastes as good as no pain…’ line. Couldn’t agree more. It’s amazing all the different things that trigger folks with IBS. That said, with the exception of the lettuce, my triggers look a lot like yours. Thank you for sharing. -Todd, Team

  • foodiewithIBS
    7 months ago

    Great story! I love coffee too and it took me years to connect the fact that my IBS symptoms usually flared up after I had a cup of coffee. I finally gave up coffee for good this past March, after a particularly terrible flare up, but I’ve felt much better since.

  • tmholland moderator
    7 months ago


    It is a great story, isn’t it. One we can all relate to. Just like I can relate to your comments about coffee. So, so hard to give up. Thank you for sharing and I hope you are well today. -Todd, Team

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