IBS Made Me Hate My life

2 min read

I love my personality, I love my body but I've been hating my life from the time of high school when I first had my IBS trauma. I was attending as usual the sport class when suddenly I couldn't control a gas explosion, not noisy but smelly. My classmates understood it was me because everyone was complaining about the smell except me, I was paralyzed and very red. That day I went home in a shock shameful state and everything changed for worse. My whole life has been a nightmare from that day. I had no friends anymore, everyone was reluctant to sit close to me and they often used to make fun of me. I cried every single day because of the shame and the fact that now everyone considered me smelly.

Just the beginning

That was only the beginning, because with time I got anxious of being close to people in closed environment, and every time this happened my brain sent signals to my intestine and the trauma would repeat itself. So the usual symptoms were an urgent need to let out the gas and to go to the bathroom. When I'm in the most anxious state I can't control my body to keep the gas in even for some seconds, so you can imagine how many times I've been through embarrassing episodes that has literally ruined my existence.

Need new intestines

Right now I'm 32 in a full time job, but I can't have the luxury to stay home and not work being in a bad economic situation. In fact last year has been one of the worst of my life: I got married and I feel miserable. At work is even worse since I'm everyday anxious because of my IBS which has converted me in the "jolly" of some people there. All the time I think about solutions that can change my life completely but even projected in my mind they seem so far away to achieve: psychological consult I tried it once but didn't work. I just need a new intestine and erase the memories of the last 17 years :D

Turning back to reality, what would help me: effective pills, a new job, and a stabilized matrimonial life. I'm sceptic this will happen soon. Also I am so sick and tired of undergoing to the same circumstances over and over again.

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holly5757 Member
Did I write this article and not know it? If not, I easily could have. 😀
sandiba Member
Hi Lana , I am sorry that you are going through this ordeal, bot it not as bad as you want to think , there are really worse things out there believe me.
ollivier71 Member
Hi Lana, I completely recognize myself in your post. I’ve also been in trouble because of my IBS from the time of middle school. A lot of people are kidding about gas or poo, but they probably don't understand that when you're sufferering from IBS, it's not the same... I could contain my gas into my intestines, but the noise that they made into my gut were noisy and could be heard during class... everybody was looking at me, I became red, and it happened so many times... I'm 37, also in a full time job, in France, and I also don't have the possibility of working from home. I'm always afraid of being in a meeting, especially when I know that they will last about 2 or 3 hours... I try to avoid foods that I know will produce an excess of gas, and made my belly making noises... it's always a shame when people are looking at me... And I know that stress does not help ! There is clearly a psychological impact in our lives. And even my doctor don't really understand. It's good to read stories on this website, it makes you feel less alone, and remind you that other people feel the same. Olivier
Elizabeth Alvarez Moderator & Contributor
<inline-mention user-id="2311965" username="lana"/> , How have you been doing? It's been a while since this post, just wanting to check in with you. I hope your symptoms have improved. Sending big hugs your way, Elizabeth (team member)
Sanzi Member
Hi @dori , thank you for this post I thought I was the only one. Not being able to control your gas specially in public makes you chronically disabled. There's no difference. Just because you look healthy doctors and people are not empathetic. :/ I can not imagine how hard this must have been for you and everyone in the comment section all these years! I'm 21 and I've living like this 6 years now. Did you ever get better?
KristenWA Member
I feel the same way! If we are being honest, when I found out I have SIBO I went through a lot of grief, and I had thoughts that SIBO ruined my life. I've spent all these years hating my body and my huge stomach! As others have said: I feel like I could have written this post.
1. KristenWA Member
 <inline-mention username="Karina" user-id="2303467"/> Aw, thanks! Yes, I've been taking antibiotics for methane SIBO and my numbers are going down. I am making progress! 😀 
2. Karina Moderator & Contributor
 <inline-mention username="kristenpark" user-id="4221724"/> So glad to hear that! Hopefully, you'll be feeling better very soon! All the best, Karina (team member)