Hi everyone,
I'm new here. I'm not sure sure if I truly have IBS but I'm in a dark place in my life because of my GI so I thought maybe I'd find some sympathy here. I was very stressed out when I left my home but, since I started grad school my life has been hell. I don't know if a combo of stress and not eating on time caused it but one day out of nowhere, my stomach and bowels had started gurgling and making weird, embarrassing gassy sounds in lecture and since then it had never stopped 24/7. It used to do this all day and all night and the apartment dorm building I live in has paper thin walls, all my neighbors have been hearing it day in and day out. They've taken to harassing and bullying me when they can non-stop since then. Especially the girls who live next door (our bedrooms are separated by a thin wall). I understand they're frustrated but I can't control it. I stay mostly in my room now and barely come out, trying to ignore all the harsh things people say, and the guys who live across the inner courtyard will watch my room through the balcony and spy/gossip/film me although I haven't been able to prove it to authorities yet. Then later on, next door will complain about me (now they hate on everything I do without reason) until late at night. I have a hard time going to sleep, fearing my stomach will make these embarrassing sounds and hearing them humiliate me. If they hear something they make fun of me amongst themselves then go to my other neighbors across the hall and tell them and they'll ridicule me together.They know I know what they're doing, so they're sneaky about it since they watch and listen for my every move. It's a whole gang surveillance kind of thing where I'm the target. I had a similar situation at home, and now I'm dealing with it again - but this time on my own with no one round me for support. Some of them are in my class and they've been mocking and ridiculing me and spreading rumors all over the small city campus I'm in so random strangers will point me out and laugh at me too. Perhaps cyberbullying, I'm not sure because I don't have social media and I'm not sure how all these people know me. Everywhere I go, I can't find peace. My suite-mates hate me and do the same behind my back while ignoring me to my face. I've talked with higher-ups and they've been unprofessional- ridiculing me behind my back with everyone else (maintenance, etc.) I've also had acid problems. People think I'm hungry or that I'm overreacting. Right now I'm taking PPis and they've helped some but when I sleep I still make these awful noises. And eventually I'll have to come off of them. Last night, I woke at 3 in the morning trying to contain my stomach noises but failed for a good 2 hours and I overheard my suitemates and roommates talking and laughing about it it since this morning. The building is so quiet you can hear a pin drop unless people are talking - then you can hear every word. All this bullying is making me stress more than I am already. Because of it, I've been skipping classes and avoiding my cohort who legitimately look down on me and will drag me for sport behind my back. They all attack and criticize me behind my back. It's too late to transfer back as I had originally rejected my state school to go out of state, but it'll look bad to beg them to take me back. Deadline shave passed. And the lease I signed is unbreakable - I can only go to 2 other apt. buildings with the same setup in this area if and only if they have space (which they don't) so really, I'm stuck here for the whole year until August. I'm scared and trying to keep it together but no matter what I do, I'm still not sure if it'll change anything. Nothing has showed up on my test results so far so I'm unsure if there is any solution when I don't know how to deal with everything.