I think I absolutely know where you're coming from.
I don't know for sure but suspect grief had a lot to do with my getting IBS.
I had a lot of losses since 1999; husband, parents, family members, one dog and friends. Plus I'd had some other real trauma I don't wish to discuss. But it was very very bad.
I just soldiered on through it. I probably didn't process my trauma and grief properly at a guess.
My gut was just normal then, my appetite good, no health problems, and I was strong and apparently resilient.
Then I adopted an ex street dog in the early 2000's. It was a difficult rescue but I made it happen. initially for her sake (my dog's),
As time passed I began to realise I had probably never been as close to another Soul as I was to her. Life was so good, positive, well. I remember feeling so happy, steady, blessed.
Her being with me seemed to heal everything from the past.
When she passed away I was devastated and I cannot describe the grief and loss I felt. I had panic attacks etc. But again soldiered on. It was years before IBS came. I knew while I was grieving that I was lucky indeed not to become ill from what I was feeling. Yes, I seemed physically well. But sometimes I'd get a random tummy upset and think nothing of it....perhaps red wine....too much greasy tofu, etc. Perhaps if something stressful happened. But in 2020 it became full blown IBS.
I think I understand.
Blessings to you. Our Soul companions passed on just a few steps before us. I am sure they are waiting for us. What a happy day that will be.