Stop Obsessing Over Triggers

By Karina

2 min read

Do you ever feel cheated, deceived, betrayed when your IBS flares up after a perfectly safe meal? I know I do. Whenever this happens, I start questioning basically everything I ever did in my life. Maybe the medication I take for my headaches contributes to my flares? Could it be that the chocolate I ate three days ago caused the flare I just had?

Trying to explain every flare

Not long ago, I suddenly got a horrible flare after eating my favorite safe food (sushi). Naturally, my mind went straight into analytic mode. Maybe the food wasn’t fresh? We had ordered it an hour ago, which is a long time for raw fish to be outside. Maybe the delivery person didn’t transport it properly. Maybe it went bad because it was sitting next to hot miso soup.

Then, my partner said something interesting: "Sometimes, there just isn’t a reason."

Naturally, I got very defensive at first. Of course, there’s a reason. I must have eaten a trigger food. The sushi must have gone bad on the way here. I had been very stressed the fast few days, maybe that’s what triggered it.

Accepting the unpredictability of IBS

But deep down, I knew that what he said was true. As much as I want to believe that my IBS can be somewhat controlled, this just isn’t always the case. I didn’t eat any of my usual trigger foods, and I still suffered a terrible flare. I wasn’t particularly stressed or anxious, and it happened anyway.

As someone who loves to be in control of my life as much as possible, accepting the unpredictable nature of IBS is very hard. It’s difficult for me to know that I could do everything right and still get IBS symptoms. At times, this stresses me out so much that I just want to give up food altogether.

However, never eating again is not really an option. And so, I’m constantly working on my mindset around IBS. Trying to wrap my head around the fact that it can’t be controlled, only managed. That no matter what I do, I’m never going to be 100 percent sure that I’ll have a flare-up-free day.

Treating IBS flares like any other illness

In my attempt to manage IBS as much as possible, I started blaming my bad choices whenever a flare hit. I found myself thinking that any particular flare could have been avoided if I only did this, if I only did that. However, this mindset just doesn’t work when it comes to a chronic illness.

At times, it will flare up, and there’s nothing I can do about it. It’s just like any other sickness: you can try to limit the risk of contagion by washing your hands frequently, but you’ll likely still catch some colds or stomach bugs. I don’t blame my bad choices when that happens, and I shouldn’t do it with IBS flares, either.

I can do everything to prevent unnecessary flares by adjusting my diet and lifestyle. But when it comes to seemingly random flares, I need to learn to let go and just wait until they pass. As of now, this is still a work in progress.

How do you deal with the unpredictable nature of IBS?

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The IrritableBowelSyndrome.net team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

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barbaraegd Member
Karina summed it up quite well! I do try to make connections to what I eat but sometimes there aren't any. I expect discomfort when I eat things I shouldn't but sometimes it just seems as though there is NO safe food anywhere! I take probiotics and Viberzi (prescription) which is the best control I've found. But still.....had to use a friends bathroom while involved in a recreational activity and avoided a mishap. So, yes, I carry that fear all the time because I know if I try to wait it out, a disaster may happen. 
1. Karina Moderator & Contributor
 <inline-mention username="barbaraegd" user-id="2328262"/> Thank you so much for sharing! I know the feeling that no food is really safe. Sometimes fasting seems like the only option to avoid flares. Wishing you all the best, Karina (team member)
hateibs Member
Thank you for this article, Karina. It is very helpful. Because I have noticed that very often when I pin down a trigger -for sure!! .....it turns out not to be one at all. So I went two months avoiding salmon, cod, haddock, spinach, radishes (which had been consistently "safe" for me before) just because I had a flare after eating them. But then I tried them again and found they were all fine. There seemed to be no rhyme or reason. Until I came up with the idea that "the flare would have happened anyway whatever I ate!" (within sensible reason of course.) It seems I get flares out of the blue, whatever I eat. I even got a flare once from one of my most gut-calming dinners, and a usual go-to when my gut has been upset: white rice and boiled eggs with lettuce! Sure there are foods that are unwise for me to eat, like onions, potato skins, and beets. (onions cause everything, bloating loose stool, cramps. Potato skins just "make me go", likewise beets (though I love them.) But I have now got to 15 safe vegetables, which is an achievement! I don't shun those foods any more, as I can eat them for weeks and be just fine. Flares after eating the fish mentioned above....made me wonder if I was histamine intolerant at one stage. Yet I have now eaten those fish for weeks and been fine. Sometimes IBS is not totally controllable.
1. Karina Moderator & Contributor
 <inline-mention username="hateibs" user-id="4146293"/> Thank you so much for sharing! I'm glad you were able to introduce those foods back into your diet. You're right about continuing to eat the things that are mostly safe - I believe that if I avoided everything that ever caused me a flare, I'd be eating air. Just like you said, we simply have to accept that sometimes flares will happen, no matter what. Wishing you all the best, Karina (team member)
ChroniKat Member
<inline-mention username="Karina" user-id="2303467"/> , I also have migraine attacks besides IBS. In migraine disease, the cause isn't the same as a trigger. The cause is inside of us, a complex part of our make-up. A trigger is something that makes it more likely that we will get an attack. I think that it must be similar for IBS, that's why the same things may not make us sick every time. Like you said, sometimes flares will happen, no matter what. All we can do is do our best to make ourselves feel the best that we can as often as we can. Hugs!
1. Michaela Contributor
 I've been lucky to never have consistent migraines, but I know of some people who do, and it can be horrible! But I can definitely see the connection you made between IBS and migraines with flares and triggers. And you're right-sometimes all you can do is make yourself feel as good as you can. Thank you for sharing! All the best, Michaela (irritablebowelsyndrome.net Team Member)
2. Karina Moderator & Contributor
 <inline-mention username="ChroniKat" user-id="4134856"/> That's a great way to look at it, thank you so much for sharing! A lot of the time, I also feel like multiple triggers play together; for example, I can eat a bigger variety of foods when I'm not stressed. But when my anxiety hits, all foods can cause symptoms. Wishing you a symptom-free day, Karina (team member)
katek Member
<inline-mention username="Karina" user-id="2303467"/> , Thank you for writing this article. I have been going through the same thing. I have IBS-C, so most days I'm only dealing with constipation. I have gotten used to not going for 3 or 4 days. At that point I usually take dulcolax, and that usually gets things moving again (at least for a few days). I have tried linzess, but it did not help. I try to be very careful about my "perceived" trigger foods. But after reading your article, I'm thinking I need to put a few of those foods back into my diet and see what happens. I know for sure that almonds are a no no, I learned that through experience. I have also assumed that if almonds are a known trigger, any type of nut is a bad idea. But now I'm rethinking dark chocolate, I love dark chocolate. Last night the abdominal cramps started up, but I was sure I had not eaten anything that was a trigger food. You can drive yourself crazy when that happens. 
1. Michaela Contributor
 We're so glad you enjoyed this article! Experimenting with previous trigger foods can feel risky, but sometimes they surprise you by not causing any issues! I hope you're able to add dark chocolate back in; it's a favorite of mine as well. Thank you for sharing! Best wishes, Michaela (irritablebowelsyndrome.net Team Member)
2. Karina Moderator & Contributor
 <inline-mention username="katek" user-id="2309821"/> I feel you on the "perceived" trigger foods! I used to eliminate so much from my diet and some of those foods actually don't cause me any issue at all. When reintroducing previous trigger foods, you could take it slow and eat just one nut or one piece of chocolate to see what happens! In my experience, especially with chocolate, it's all about the quantity I eat anyway. Let us know how it goes! Hugs, Karina (team member)
bookloverdeb Member
<inline-mention username="Karina" user-id="2303467"/> this article is SO me! In fact, obesessing over what caused GI upset led me down a dangerous path - down to 80 lbs., hospitalized, feeding tube for 8 months. Through a lot of work with various counselors, GI doctors and a dietitian, I have learned to accept, though not without some frustration, that sometimes my body will just do what it does, and that trying to determine the cause only causes more stress and more GI upset. Yes, determining clear trigger foods is important (sadly for me, I think avocado is one), but I now know that I can't NOT eat, and having a diverse diet for my gut is important. I, too, want to control so many aspects of my life, which led to dangerously restrictive dietary choices. Having a flare, or what for me is daily discomfort (some days worse than others) is not helped by obsessing over the exact, yet unknowable, cause. I am so glad to know that I am not alone in trying to do that! I have learned to make ONE change at a time, do it slowly in small amounts, and never stop trying.