Sharing a House With IBS

Lately, my housing situation has been a shenanigan.

My fiancé moved to the Netherlands at the end of 2021 and I’ve gone back and forth from Italy since then. I finally made it to move to Amsterdam in January 2023.

Moving very often

In the past year and a half, we changed 5 houses. The country has been facing huge housing issues in the past few years. Every rental property posted online receives an average of 400 requests within an hour. It is madness.

We finally managed to find a place that is going to be available from June. However, in the meantime, we stayed between temporary houses with random people and amazing friends who hosted us.

Couch surfing with IBS

I do not need to explain my internal burden of living with people that I know but are not my partner or family. Sharing an everyday routine, house, and restroom. With IBS.

Luckily my IBS is not at its peak lately, this is thanks to our great friends. Nevertheless, before that, I spent horrible days with strangers that just did not care that someone else was living with them. They stayed for an hour sitting in the restroom watching youtube videos, while I felt I was about to explode. The house was dirty, they were dirty. Sometimes I just wonder how some people can survive in a civil society without being punched in the face daily.

Of course, the stress of the situation only made my IBS worst.

Stress and rushing around causes flares

Mornings are the worst time of the day for me. It’s a very busy time of the day and everyone is in a rush to go to work or school, and my IBS flares. What a timing!

Evenings are a little bit easier as we are not running anywhere. Even so, we share the food and I don’t really feel that it’s fair to be picky for those lovely souls that host us. They even know that I love to cook and they make requests. I honestly feel bad about denying them what they wish. After all, they make their best effort to help us in any way.

I try to be as honest and clear as I can about my needs when it comes to sharing my situation. Anyway, the weight of my issue should not fall on somebody that has no fault about it.

Sharing a bathroom with strangers

It is such an intricate situation. Sharing a house and the bathroom with strangers is a real nightmare for us with IBS. It makes me feel frustrated, sad, unworthy, and wrong.

I am aware that everything is in my mind and my friends support and love me. Even so, on a personal and mental level, it is hard to always feel worthless.

Try to always look at the bright side of things is a full time job, but I'm willing to do the work. I am loved, I am respected, I finally found a house, and I have so many people around that do the impossible to help us. We all make our effort to be worthy of living a healthy and happy life. Sometimes IBS gets in the way, but we need to remember that while love, kindness, and altruism surround us, we are the richest people in the world.