How To Manage Pain and IBS During A Stressful Time

I'm getting married next month! Planning a wedding is a dream come true, but let’s be honest—it’s also incredibly stressful! As I get closer to my big day, I’m juggling a million things at once: picking the perfect venue, finalizing the guest list, and making sure every detail is just right. But on top of all that, I’m also dealing with chronic pain and IBS, and from 1200km from home. If you’re in the same boat, you know how tricky it can be to manage your health while planning the most important day of your life. Here’s how I’m trying to keep everything under control, and maybe these tips will help you too.

The importance of self care

I’ve quickly learned that if I don’t take care of myself, nothing else gets done. So, I’ve made self-care a non-negotiable part of my routine. Each day, I carve out a little time to do something that relaxes me, whether it’s a short yoga session, some deep breathing, or simply a peaceful walk in the park. Luckily the weather is still really lovely in the Netherlands, and I take the chance to spend time outside. These small moments help me reset and keep my stress levels in check, which is crucial for managing both my pain and IBS.

I’ve realized that my body speaks to me—loudly—especially when I’m pushing myself too hard. When I start feeling fatigued or notice a flare-up coming on, I take it as a sign to slow down. It’s tempting to just power through, but I’ve learned that taking a break when I need it helps me avoid bigger problems later. It’s okay to take a step back, delegate tasks, or even say no to something if it means protecting my health. This has been a hard lesson to learn, but being a control freak does not make my life any easier.

Stress makes my IBS worse

Stress is my biggest enemy right now. I’ve found that even a little bit of stress can make my symptoms worse, so I’m trying to stay as calm as possible. One thing that’s really helped me is deep breathing exercises. Just a few minutes of focused breathing can work wonders for calming my mind and easing tension in my body. I also try to remind myself that everything doesn’t have to be perfect—what matters most is enjoying the day with my loved ones. At the end, it's just a party.

I started keeping a symptom journal a few weeks ago, and it’s been a game-changer. By tracking what I eat, how I feel, and what activities I do each day, I’ve been able to spot patterns and avoid things that trigger my symptoms. For instance, I’ve noticed that certain foods or stressful tasks can set off my IBS, so I’m making a point to avoid them as much as possible. This journal has become my little guidebook for navigating the lead-up to the wedding, and life in general.

It's hard to ask for help

I’m a bit of a perfectionist, so asking for help doesn’t come naturally to me. But I’ve realized that I can’t do everything on my own, especially when my health is involved. Whether it’s delegating tasks to my fiancé, family, or friends, or hiring a wedding planner to take some of the pressure off, I’m learning to lean on others more. It’s amazing how much stress it takes off my shoulders when I share the load. I don't have ANY intention in becoming a BRIDE-ZILLA.

Finally, I’m reminding myself to focus on what really matters. At the end of the day, my wedding is about celebrating love with the people who mean the most to me. It doesn’t have to be perfect, and neither do I. What’s important is that I’m healthy enough to enjoy the day and make beautiful memories.

Planning a wedding while managing pain and IBS is definitely challenging, but by taking care of myself and staying mindful of my body’s needs, I’m confident I can make it to the big day feeling my best. And if you’re going through something similar, I hope these tips can help you too!