As a little kid I would often tense up when having a bowel movement due to mild cerebral palsy. Doctors told me to stop not knowing it was completely out of my control. Years down the line I found myself having to miss every opportunity of social gathering and would barely ever leave the house therefore becoming home schooled. I began to believe that this is how life is supposed to be as it was a norm for me for so long.
Hospital after Hospital, medications and G.I’s rushing to get me out the door, telling me as a kid it will get better over time it; was all in my head. I get impacted for days, sometimes weeks at a time, if I don’t bother to take anything. I have leaking stool which leaves every possible social aspect out of the picture – water parks, vacations, friends, girlfriends etc. I am now taking colonoscopy prep just to clear myself out holding on for a sense of hope that I will eventually be able to take control of my life before it’s to late.
Having leaky stools is horrible. Everywhere you go is embarrassing you try to explain yourself but no one understands. Such simple things become a difficult task. Hiding this from your friends and family is so difficult to cope with.
I’ve drowned myself in video games for years to escape it, not knowing what I was doing to myself. I really don’t know what to do at this point I believe it’s a problem with my pelvic floor muscles. Currently I’ve made an appointment for biofeedback to get these muscles working again.
No one deserves to suffer from IBS; it’s so life controlling. I am very thankful there is support here knowing you’re not alone with this.